Who We Are And Who We Become Depend On Whom We Love

In this "post-Zen" period of my life, in addition to continuing my internal inquiries through the practice of zazen (sitting meditation), my external interests and areas of personal inquiry have expanded beyond study of Buddhist sutras and Zen koans, and into a more scientific exploration of the mind and human nature. This is not at all an abandonment of the former studies; as a matter of fact, my "scientific" studies are informed by all that I have picked up (i.e., what little I've learned) from Buddhism.

But to be more specific, since Labor Day weekend, I have started a massive, on-line open course (MOOC) on introductory neurology through Harvard University (MCB80x, The Electrical Properties of the Neuron), while separately reading Erich Fromm's The Anatomy of Human Destructiveness.  These two studies have informed and influenced my other reading, including on the internet, where I came across a very interesting website on Human Molecular Template Theory by American electro-chemical engineer (and surfer) Libb Thims, from which most of the following discussion is derived.

If I understand Thims correctly, and there's every reason in the world to assume that I don't, Human Molecular Template Theory holds that what governs the spontaneity of human behavior can be explained in terms of the processes that govern the spontaneity of chemical reactions. Specifically, beginning at conception and continuing into the early years of life, people construct mental and behavioral templates from their surroundings in such a manner as to emulate those attachment behaviors found to be desirable and negate or deter those attachment behaviors found to be repulsive.  These mental and behavioral templates are based on the impressions made of others but are carried by the individual in a manner similar to the basic protein-enzyme "lock-and-key" chemical models.

Do I need to point out to you that these mental and behavioral templates are basically the same thing I've been discussing as schema or samskara for some time now?  Or the parallels to the herding mentality discussed by Jing Chen?

To a large extent, a person's personality is based upon the "attachment templates" formed by the people, both good or bad, that one meets in life. In psychology, it is known that people emulate behaviors of those they admire, desire, or to whom they are attracted. Hence, by logical extrapolation, it is reasonable to assume that over the course of a person's life, he or she constructs their ego-self from templates based on the specific interactions with the people they encounter.

Human Molecular Template Theory postulates that the basic templating processes occur in the central nervous system, and that the neuro-template structures exist as combinations of programmable, voltage-controlled, neuronal switches that together form the integrated circuits of the mind.

This model is the same as Konrad Lorenz’s "imprinting," in which young infants are instinctively drawn to the attracting regions of the parent, and are henceforth molded and shaped behaviorally off that first template and other templates that follow.  A human being lives in utero for the first 10 lunar months of his or her life, and then spends the first 3 years of life, on average, attached in a maternal-infant bond relationship from which it will develop subsequent templates. Other early templates include paternal-child bonds, sibling-sibling bonds, friendship bonds, distal family bonds, imaginary bonds, or conceptual bonds lived vicariously through books, television, movies, etc.  American bonding researchers Stephen Bank and Michael Kahn maintain that siblings are central molding factor involved in the templating of a person, more so even than that of parental influence. Their view is that "brothers and sisters, whether the relationship has been contentious or calm, satisfying or frustrating, filled with conflict or deeply comforting, can provide the touchstones and templates which mold each other’s lives."

In early youth and into adolescence, these precursory templates will serve as models by which the person will begin to test teenage romantic-sexual templates.  In adult life, a woman may specifically attach to the attracting region of a man’s personality, ambition, wealth, or occupation based on the templates accrued. Likewise, a man may specifically attach to the attracting region of a woman’s body, accomplishment, intelligence, or sense of humor, and in each case be molded off that template.

According to Lewis, Amini, and Lannon’s 2000 General Theory of Love, the wordless ties each of us has to others "determine our mood, stabilize and maintain our health, and change the structure of our brains, so that, in a very real sense, who we are and who we become depend on whom we love."